A Grand Design
Chapter 13
He
opened his eyes to see Marlena slumped in the armchair sleeping, and smiled.
She'd been watching over him again, but had fallen asleep before making it to
the other room. This was one amazing woman. She cared, she hardly knew him and
yet she truly cared about how he was feeling, about his life and his pain. John
never believed there were people like that in the world, people who could be so
selfless as to risk their own personal safety for the sake of another, without
expectation. His world was in direct contrast to that way of thinking. It was
dark and cold, and everyone he knew was always looking out for number one.
John
wasn't quite sure how to respond to her, whether he should trust in her
goodness and caring. Someone that good, that pure, she wouldn't stay with
someone like him, not in the long run. If he let himself care for her, she
would leave him, just as everyone else he had ever felt close to had done. One
way or the other, by death or by choice, they left him and he was alone again. 'Don't
think about all that now, just get yourself healed up and take it as it comes.'
Generally, that was his way, to deal with whatever happened as it unfolded,
rather than waste time looking ahead to what might never take place.
Deciding
it was best to let her sleep, John found a pillow and put it behind her head so
she wouldn't wake up with a stiff neck. Then he proceeded to check his bandage,
debating whether or not to climb into the tub for a shower, something he knew
he desperately needed. It took him a minute or two to figure a way to keep the
bandage, which looked like it had been changed fairly recently, from getting
wet. John ended up taking a plastic garbage bag and tying it around his
midsection. Not too pretty, but effective. Smiling at his ingenuity, he turned
on the water, waited for it to warm up and then stepped into the stream.
"Ah... that feels good," he muttered to himself, basking in the
warmth of it. John couldn't remember a time when a shower was more welcome or
appreciated.
A
few minutes later, he was standing in front of the mirror with a towel wrapped
around his waist, looking at his face for the first time since his ordeal
began. It was more than a little battered, especially the spot where the bullet
had grazed him. That looked downright nasty and it hurt like hell, but due to
Marlena's expertise, like the bullet wound to the gut, it was starting to heal.
Besides that, he was badly in need of a shave. Shaving was definitely a good
idea because the latest pictures the Old Man had were of John in his priestly
garb, with a beard and mustache. Without the facial hair, he wouldn't be as
easy for that man's goons or law enforcement types to spot, or at least he hoped
that would be the case.
Just
as he put the razor to his face, he heard a soft sigh and then, "Oh
my....." John turned around to see Marlena standing there admiring his
nearly naked state. He had forgotten that he'd opened the door to let the steam
out after completing his shower.
"Uh,
hi..." was all he could manage to say in reply, flashing her an
embarrassed grin she found adorable.
She
took a step back and averted her gaze slightly. "Hi, John... I'm sorry I
didn't realize...."
"My
fault, I left the door open... I'm sorry," he said, blushing slightly.
"No
need to apologize, I'll just.... close it and leave you your privacy,
then..." she said, backing up another step but still facing him, if not
quite meeting his eyes.
"Uh,
yea... okay, that'd be...great." She couldn't stop staring and he couldn't
refrain from smiling at her, liking the fact that she was clearly attracted to
him and wasn't even trying to hide it.
On
impulse, he closed the distance between them.
She
felt her breath leave her as she inhaled his strong masculine scent.
"Oh..."
His
hands were on her cheeks, caressing her skin with gentleness she hadn't yet
seen, and then he carefully drew her closer. "You're so beautiful,
Marlena... in every way, you're *so* beautiful to me." She was like fine
china and he was almost afraid he'd break her.
"Oh,
John...." she didn't think she could bear the anticipation any longer; she
desperately wanted him to kiss her. No, she needed him to kiss her, needed it
like she'd never needed anyone or anything before.
She
was trembling and he wondered if he was scaring her. He dropped his hands and
said, "What's wrong, did I....do something wrong?"
Shaking
her head slightly, she whispered a reply, "No, no, John... you did
something right, only you didn't finish it."
He
was bewildered. "What... what are you....saying?"
She
didn't answer him with words, but grabbed his mouth and did what she'd been
aching to do for what seemed like weeks.
John
was lost in sensation as their tongues collided in an explosion of pent up
passion. He felt the temperature rising by degree and heard himself panting as
she moaned with mounting pleasure.
On
instinct, their bodies moved in perfect time, gliding out of the bathroom and toward
the bed in the front room that had been changed the night before. When they
arrived, John started to lift her. Thinking of his injury, she helped him and
soon, she was lying down on her back, with this incredibly sexy man leaning
over her, planting soft moist kisses all over her face, neck, and chest.
Their
eyes met and spoke of longings untold. Marlena reached up to run her hands over
the rippled muscles of his finely toned chest and sighed. Sensing he'd been
holding his weight too long because of the still healing wound, she nudged him
to roll and lie flat on his back. He smiled, enjoying her protective nature,
and complied.
She
laid down next to him and they stared into each other's eyes for awhile,
mesmerized while gently touching and caressing the skin that was being revealed
as she removed his towel and he disrobed her. Within a few minutes, they were
naked and holding each other close, massaging and stroking with tenderness.
As
passions rose, their movements became more and more frenzied, the flames of
desire burning bright and hot. Marlena couldn't believe she could feel something
so powerful for someone she'd only met a week or so earlier. How could she need
him so?
John
immersed himself in the experience, loving every second of their physical
intimacy, not thinking about anything but pleasing her, and in the process
finding himself wanting her as he'd never wanted another woman in all his life.
"Oh, Marlena... this is incredible, you're so.. perfect, you're
perfect."
"So
are you, John... oh, John, make love to me. Make love to me now, I want you and
I need you."
"I
need you too, Doc, I need you so much," he said with intensity. He'd said
the same word before, but somehow this was different. He was calling her by
that name, as if he truly knew her, not just to shorten the professional title.
She
drew back, shocked at his expression of endearment. "What did you just
call me?"
"Doc,
I...called you, Doc. I don't know why I just did that."
Marlena
sat up in bed, staring at him, searching for some sign of recognition,
searching for some trace of the man she'd loved so deeply, the only man who had
ever called her Doc.
"Who
are you?"
He
only looked confused. "Marlena, what's this all about, you know who I am,
I'm John Black."
"No
one ever called me that but my husband Roman Brady. How did you know to call me
that?"
Shutting
his eye, he probed his memory and came up blank. "I don't know why I
called you that, I'm sorry, if it upsets you, I won't do it. I didn't mean to
hurt you, Marlena. I never want to hurt you, I only want to...." He
stopped, suddenly uncertain and unwilling to risk being vulnerable.
"You
only want to what, John..... "
"I
want to... please you, make you feel good. I'm sorry if I messed that up."
Shaking
her head, she sighed and said, "No, you didn't, John, you didn't do anything
wrong. It was me, that name evoked some powerful memories, that's all. It's
alright."
Noticing
she was shivering again, he wrapped his arms around her slender body and simply
held her. After a minute or so, she relaxed into the embrace and they snuggled
for awhile.
It
was nice and safe, a good place to start, she thought. Passion was wonderful,
but loving affection without expectation was a foundation on which to build a
relationship.
They
laid together in silence for a long time before she broke it, asking a question
that had remained on her mind. "John, are you mad that we didn't... make
love?"
"No,
I'm not mad. Can't say I'm not a little disappointed though," he said,
pushing himself up on his left elbow to look at her.
"We
still can, you know."
Kissing
her on the nose, he said, "I know, but you know what, I think we should
wait."
"You
do?" She was surprised. It wasn't often that the male of the species opted
for caution when it came to the physical aspects of love and romance.
"Yep,
it'll give us a better chance to get to know each other, without the sex to
complicate things."
That
sounded wise. "I think you're right, John, it will."
Lying
on his back, his head turned slightly towards her, he asked a question,
"So, what's your favorite color?"
"My
favorite color... John, what are you doing?"
He
was grinning. "I'm getting to know you better. What's your favorite color,
mine's blue."
"Funny,
so is mine, " she said with a broad smile, thinking this could be
fun." Okay, how about this one... favorite food. Mine is linguini with
clam sauce."
He
made a face. "Want to guess mine?"
"Pizza..."
The
sound he made was the perfect imitation of a buzzer and she laughed.
"Okay, wise guy, what is it?"
"
A good filet mignon with French cut green beans almondine, new potatoes
seasoned with dill and garlic, and fresh baked crescents. French of course."
Marlena
laughed out loud. I'm not buying that."
"What,
you think I'm not accustomed to fine dining, a rogue like me, is that it?"
he asked, only partly joking with her.
"No,
I'm not saying that, it's just that.... well, you don't strike me as..."
"As
what, the kind of guy who likes eating in nice restaurants, the kind of guy who
knows what a fine meal tastes like? Well, you don't know the half of it, Doctor
Evans!"
"John,
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." She realized she had unwittingly
pushed a button.
"It's
okay, I should have known it would happen. We're from two different worlds,
Marlena. This will never work." He climbed out of bed, went to his dresser
and pulled out some underwear, jeans, and a t-shirt. And she sighed, watching
him pull away from her and wondering exactly what had just happened.
Chapter 14 not up yet
Sand@glasscity.net
Sandra H. Bondelier
2000