Touches
the current of love
So
deep in me........
Marlena
lingered in the board room, running her hand along the smooth wooden surface of
the table and remembering....
When
she shut her eyes, it was all there in such detail... every move he made, every
sound, every passionate glance of those deep blue eyes...
Every
sigh in the night........
'Alive...’ he said she made him feel awake and alive. Making
love with her had brought him back from the edge, allowing him to experience
feelings he thought were dead inside, feelings of love and desire and the
willingness to go on in spite of all his losses. She had given him all that.
Now, she wanted him to let her go, to just walk away from what they shared,
from the love that dwelled forever deep within their hearts.
How
would he handle it? How much pain could he bear?
Every
tear that you cry
Seduces
me..........
She
recalled with profound regret, the soft tears he wept when she told him not to
say he loved her. She would never forget his heartbroken expression, how
confused and hurt he was when she rushed off into the stormy darkness and left
him standing there bare chested. She left him to make sense out of what
happened between them... as if she expected him to just go ahead and fly off to
Europe after making the most incredibly pleasurable love either had ever
experienced.
And
all that I am
And
all that I'll be...
What
she had shared of herself made her feel emotions she never thought she would feel
again, and the intensity with which they made love was like nothing she'd ever
before experienced in her life. It was just like he said. It was wild, out of
control and unpredictable, much like the powerful electrifying storm that raged
on outside the plane.
The
more Marlena thought about her time with him, she realized that she too had
never felt more alive. more vibrant, never more intimately connected to someone
than she did with him that night. and again when they were together here in
this same board room. The indescribable pleasure of his touch, the fire in his
eyes, the moist sweetness of his kisses.
It
was all so amazing, as if he held the key to everything she ever wanted,
everything she ever dreamed.
Means
nothing at all
If
you can't be with me...
All she wanted in those
moments was John. She wanted to fill herself up with him. She wanted to drink
him in, to breathe in his rugged masculine scent, to bury herself in that
chisled chest, to immerse herself in the warmth and comfort of his arms around
her body, the aching desire he stirred within her by the teasing motions of his
tongue inside her mouth, and the stimulating sensations he created as his
fingers were caressing her bare skin.
Or
your sweetest caress
Seduces
me..........
She
wanted him and nobody else, nothing else mattered. Her breathing quickened and
she felt the warmth of desire as the images played over and over in her mind's
eye. 'Oh, John.'
I
don't care about tomorrow
I've
given up on yesterday
Here
and now is all that matters
Right
here with you is where I'll stay.......
It was as if time stopped
and the world quit turning on its axis when they were together. But, eventually
those moments did end and she was left with the most difficult circumstances any
woman could ever face, torn between two men, between a love from the past that
she had been trying to make work again and a love she never could have
predicted, a connection born of a special time in space. One that had never
died.
Theirs
was a love that lay buried beneath layers of explanations and a confusing array
of complex emotions neither of them could fully comprehend.
Everything
in this world
Every
voice in the night
Every
little thing of beauty
Comes
shining through in your eyes
And
all that is you becomes part of me too........
John
Black, if that were even his real name, not that she cared. The person he was
with her, whatever the name he was called; that man was in her heart and in her
mind and in her soul forever. There was no avoiding it now. Marlena was
beginning to acknowledge that she loved him like no other and that she would
never stop wanting him. She chuckled softly when she heard his trademark
emphatic statement inside her mind. "And that's a fact." Everything
about him was entwined with everything she was inside. He knew her better than
anyone else ever had and his love was so intense, so enticing, so alluring.
Cause
all that you do seduces me.......
Still
there was Roman and the children. Loving two men at the same time; she hadn't
believed it was actually possible. When her patients suffered similar dilemmas,
she always concluded that her patients loved one more than the other and they
just needed to be more in touch with their inner selves, with their emotions. And then they would know whom they truly
loved.
What
would she do? What could she do?
As
she stood there alone in that board room laboring to find that truth within
herself, she pictured her future and she knew. As she had known in those tense
fearful moments when they were trapped in the warehouse on the verge of
perishing together.
If
I should die tomorrow
I'd
go down with a smile on my face
I
fall down on my knees for the love we made........
It
was late afternoon; he'd gone home to the Loft to do some paperwork,
undisturbed by extraneous concerns. Only, it was the internal processes that
kept him from accomplishing much during the past few weeks. Marlena was all he
could think about. She was in his thoughts constantly, everything about her
making him long for the days when they were the ones who were married and
raising children, when he bore another man's name--a name and identity it was
still hard to let go of even now, well over a year later.
John
had finally come to the realization that in his mind and more importantly in
his heart, that letting go of the name meant letting go of Marlena and the
memories they made, forgetting the amazing, almost otherworldly love they made,
that miraculous, blissful reunion on their pier. What it was like to hold her
deep in the night, the way she reached out to him when Isabella died and
brought him back from the edge of an imaginary cliff on which he'd been
teetering, the smell of her hair when she'd just washed it, the look of desire
in her eyes, the long talks about anything and everything, or the tears she
cried recently when he shared his feelings for her and told her how difficult
it was for him to stay away from her. How he struggled with all his might to do
as she said she wanted.
John
couldn't forget or let go of all of that, not now and probably not ever.
Every
sigh in the night
Every
tear that you cry
Seduces
me......
The day was grey and dreary
and John couldn't seem to concentrate anyway, so he set the documents he been
reviewing on the small table in front of him and laid down on the couch. Within
a few seconds, he felt himself dozing off.
Drifting,
floating, flying high. Laughing, crying, holding hands. In his dreams they were
always together and SO happy, with no confusion about identities, just sharing
their deep and abiding love with no shame, no guilt. There was no doubt or
anguish, they knew in their hearts they were always meant to be.
Seduces
me...
As
the heavenly vision of bliss continued on ever pleasantly in his peaceful dream
state, their bodies intertwined, their hearts forever joined.
There
was a knock on the door. John opened his eyes and tried to discern what was
happening. He sat up and listened. Was it all a part of his dream or was it
real? Could it be, dare he hope? If it were Marlena, would his dreams somehow
come to be?
And
all that you do seduces me...